Many of us think that all our problems will be solved if we can move away. If you put yourself in a new situation, surrounded by new people where no one knows you, everything will magically resolve it
Thank you! I moved here alone, but only after traveling solo for 3 years prior. However the first month I moved here I met a guy, then broke up, and met another guy. So I moved alone, I do not live here alone, and have a support system around me now!
I lived in my mind for so many years, and I think I about went insane before I realized the problem was me, and to go inward.. it is such a hard realization, and the best one of my life. The good things are always hard work.
I can identify with a lot of this. After trying a few places and blaming the local culture for my inability to adapt, I went to Taiwan with a new, more self-critical attitude, and it made all the difference. Thanks for reminding me of some useful lessons learned!
That is amazing! Its interesting how it can help your experiences improve. I wish I knew this lesson when I was in Japan, it is a tough culture and I struggled. Now looking back, I realize a lot of what happened was my internal world collapsing. So I am still learning everyday also:)
So true. I slow traveled through two countries in Central America thinking I would magically find some paradise where all my questions would be answered and my purpose obvious. Though I met nice people and had good experiences, it was no such. In fact my purpose was even less clear. I went home and started the hard work of working on myself.
yess!! The same things happened at the beginning of my travels also. Travel is a great way to shine a light on ourselves! That is amazing that you had that revelation and turned inward!
Great piece, with a lot to think about here. For me a key factor to adapt well is to be ready to change your habits. As a French that moved to Chile I was open to changing my comfort and daily habits (for example on food, hanging out, doing sport). Instead of comparing things with France, I just told myself "this is what I got here and I have to adapt to it".
Thank you. I think being able to change your habits is so important to living abroad. I also have that this is what they have here and i have to adapt, mindset. If we don´t have that, we will go insane! I spent some time in Chile, such a beautiful country!
My favorite: “Who knows? All I know is whatever you think is true.” Really like the sentiment here. Is it charitable? Zen? Empathy? IDK, all I know is it’s wisdom packed into a few words. And please keep the photos coming. I love them.
I can't see myself living in another country - or living anywhere at all. Maybe I am running away all the time? It is frustrating being in South America and not being able to find things I'm used to but I know I just need to learn and adjust. I love figuring things out - and there is so much to figure out all the time.
I thought the exact same for at least 4 years! I never wanted to settle down, around year 6 I got restless about being restless. South America will test you for sure, it is not an easy place to travel... especially for those of us who are used to certain things, and being able to get what we need. I started my travels in South America and it took me forever to figure things out! Challenging and fun.. once you get over the frustrations!
“Wherever you go, there you are.” Yes! Jon Kabat-Zinn!
About 10 years ago, we seriously considered moving out to a remote wooded area for some of the more obvious reasons. For technical reasons, it didn’t work out at the time. In the next two or three years, my wife and I came to realize it would have crushed us, there are a handful of people who are precious to us and we crave their proximity. I would have died on the inside without their presence.
yep! sometimes a higher power/source/intuition kicks in also! We have an ah-ha moment and then the clarity comes through, and those technical reasons saved you!
Bravo, so eloquently said my dear. I am considerably older than you but we have many things in common. I was a hospital nurse for 25 years and I seek meaning in my life.
You have given much insight regarding your journey and your wise beyond your years. I moved on from Costa Rica because it was flooded with Americans that were just like me in so many ways. I sought to embrace the culture and the language. Many others only sought to recreate Santa Monica. They lived in gated communities, spoke only English and interacted minimally with the country they were in. I was often asked why I bothered to learn a new language. Eventually these attitudes sickened me, literally.
One of the principal reasons I chose Colombia was the ease to immerse myself in the language. The only criticism I have is you mentioned earlier that you purchased your finca without a lawyer! This tells me you were dealing with people you trusted Totally. What about, no da papaya….I look forward to reading more. Abrazos amiga.
I have heard the same things about Costa Rica. What part of Colombia are you living in? Wow 25 years.. not sure I would have survived that long!! Yea I am not sure I could live near a ton of other foreigners like that, where I live there are a handful, but I rarely see any other foreigners around! Yep.. no lawyer, my guy is Colombian and he knew what to go get at the government buildings and we used a notary to help us. Plus the guy I bought it from was a friend, which helped... he also had to trust me, he actually wanted half the money via cash.. and finally he will get it this week.. but it def was two sided. I almost backed out of the deal because I told him I had to wait for my cedula to open an bank to transfer, and he was fine with that... However that does not always happen. And a lawyer is always better if you don´t know the other person!!
We had a similar discussion here of not trying to force others of a different culture to fit into your expectations. If things aren’t right, I agree that I have to search inside myself. It’s not likely the place or the people, it’s me.
exactly! it is alway an interesting discussion especially among expats, and locals. I have talked to so many people about it during my travels. Even as a long term traveler, a lot of the travelers that had difficulty accepting other ways of doing things, usually hated traveling and couldn´t wait to go home! It´s funny I have struggled in some places to fit in and each time I looked at why, it was always something that I internally struggled with.. so interesting.
I live near Jericó, Antioquia. We plan on having space for people to visit probably end of next year.. we have to build a cabin for guests, and we want to host volunteers to help around the farm also!!
From the reasons you mentioned I shouldn't have the obvious outwardly problems. I've been missing a support tribe in this area for five years. If my husband wasn't my person I'd be in big trouble. The other day I got to thinking. If I had a problem here who would I call orher than my husband? Answer: there isn't anyone except one person I know i can count on. We only found each other a few months ago. That's one reason I know I'm not in my happy place. I know when I'm in the right place, things kind of just happily happen. Serendipity rings true without my having to go look for it. It's happened too many times to list. I've moved over 43 times last count... but what sticks out are the places I found my tribes. I still keep in touch with many of these precious souls from my past. Sometimes I pickup the phone and call to confirm it really was how I remembered the way things were. Happily this has rung true each time. Many are getting older and dying off. It's easy for me to pack up and move, more difficult to find the right place... and and at this stage of my life mistakes can get costly. It isn't easy to move like it used to be... so moving to a different country brings on a new level of excitement and adventure for me... at this point if I choose the right part of the world to start I can tweak from there. :)
It is def hard to move, and finding the right people is always a challenge. I am lucky I have my sisters and a few really good friends, but they all live in the US.But I have been living alone where no one gets me for a while, I feel more connected here that I did living in the US. I think when you find your place you will know! I am guessing somewhere that it is green all year, and sunny.. that always helps me!
So much wisdom here.
Just curious Sara, did you move solo out to Colombia?
Parts that resonated with me: "Others are always going to put their fears on me" "If it all fails, I fail, not you."
Sometimes, the hardest place to live is the mind, this encourages doing hard inner self-work.
Thank you! I moved here alone, but only after traveling solo for 3 years prior. However the first month I moved here I met a guy, then broke up, and met another guy. So I moved alone, I do not live here alone, and have a support system around me now!
I lived in my mind for so many years, and I think I about went insane before I realized the problem was me, and to go inward.. it is such a hard realization, and the best one of my life. The good things are always hard work.
I can identify with a lot of this. After trying a few places and blaming the local culture for my inability to adapt, I went to Taiwan with a new, more self-critical attitude, and it made all the difference. Thanks for reminding me of some useful lessons learned!
That is amazing! Its interesting how it can help your experiences improve. I wish I knew this lesson when I was in Japan, it is a tough culture and I struggled. Now looking back, I realize a lot of what happened was my internal world collapsing. So I am still learning everyday also:)
So true. I slow traveled through two countries in Central America thinking I would magically find some paradise where all my questions would be answered and my purpose obvious. Though I met nice people and had good experiences, it was no such. In fact my purpose was even less clear. I went home and started the hard work of working on myself.
yess!! The same things happened at the beginning of my travels also. Travel is a great way to shine a light on ourselves! That is amazing that you had that revelation and turned inward!
Great piece, with a lot to think about here. For me a key factor to adapt well is to be ready to change your habits. As a French that moved to Chile I was open to changing my comfort and daily habits (for example on food, hanging out, doing sport). Instead of comparing things with France, I just told myself "this is what I got here and I have to adapt to it".
Thank you. I think being able to change your habits is so important to living abroad. I also have that this is what they have here and i have to adapt, mindset. If we don´t have that, we will go insane! I spent some time in Chile, such a beautiful country!
My favorite: “Who knows? All I know is whatever you think is true.” Really like the sentiment here. Is it charitable? Zen? Empathy? IDK, all I know is it’s wisdom packed into a few words. And please keep the photos coming. I love them.
thank you so much! I will def keep taking pics!
I can't see myself living in another country - or living anywhere at all. Maybe I am running away all the time? It is frustrating being in South America and not being able to find things I'm used to but I know I just need to learn and adjust. I love figuring things out - and there is so much to figure out all the time.
I thought the exact same for at least 4 years! I never wanted to settle down, around year 6 I got restless about being restless. South America will test you for sure, it is not an easy place to travel... especially for those of us who are used to certain things, and being able to get what we need. I started my travels in South America and it took me forever to figure things out! Challenging and fun.. once you get over the frustrations!
“Wherever you go, there you are.” Yes! Jon Kabat-Zinn!
About 10 years ago, we seriously considered moving out to a remote wooded area for some of the more obvious reasons. For technical reasons, it didn’t work out at the time. In the next two or three years, my wife and I came to realize it would have crushed us, there are a handful of people who are precious to us and we crave their proximity. I would have died on the inside without their presence.
yep! sometimes a higher power/source/intuition kicks in also! We have an ah-ha moment and then the clarity comes through, and those technical reasons saved you!
Dearest Sara,
Bravo, so eloquently said my dear. I am considerably older than you but we have many things in common. I was a hospital nurse for 25 years and I seek meaning in my life.
You have given much insight regarding your journey and your wise beyond your years. I moved on from Costa Rica because it was flooded with Americans that were just like me in so many ways. I sought to embrace the culture and the language. Many others only sought to recreate Santa Monica. They lived in gated communities, spoke only English and interacted minimally with the country they were in. I was often asked why I bothered to learn a new language. Eventually these attitudes sickened me, literally.
One of the principal reasons I chose Colombia was the ease to immerse myself in the language. The only criticism I have is you mentioned earlier that you purchased your finca without a lawyer! This tells me you were dealing with people you trusted Totally. What about, no da papaya….I look forward to reading more. Abrazos amiga.
I have heard the same things about Costa Rica. What part of Colombia are you living in? Wow 25 years.. not sure I would have survived that long!! Yea I am not sure I could live near a ton of other foreigners like that, where I live there are a handful, but I rarely see any other foreigners around! Yep.. no lawyer, my guy is Colombian and he knew what to go get at the government buildings and we used a notary to help us. Plus the guy I bought it from was a friend, which helped... he also had to trust me, he actually wanted half the money via cash.. and finally he will get it this week.. but it def was two sided. I almost backed out of the deal because I told him I had to wait for my cedula to open an bank to transfer, and he was fine with that... However that does not always happen. And a lawyer is always better if you don´t know the other person!!
We had a similar discussion here of not trying to force others of a different culture to fit into your expectations. If things aren’t right, I agree that I have to search inside myself. It’s not likely the place or the people, it’s me.
exactly! it is alway an interesting discussion especially among expats, and locals. I have talked to so many people about it during my travels. Even as a long term traveler, a lot of the travelers that had difficulty accepting other ways of doing things, usually hated traveling and couldn´t wait to go home! It´s funny I have struggled in some places to fit in and each time I looked at why, it was always something that I internally struggled with.. so interesting.
Where are you in Colombia? Maybe I'll come visit and help you pick some coffee 😊
I live near Jericó, Antioquia. We plan on having space for people to visit probably end of next year.. we have to build a cabin for guests, and we want to host volunteers to help around the farm also!!
Sounds amazing!
From the reasons you mentioned I shouldn't have the obvious outwardly problems. I've been missing a support tribe in this area for five years. If my husband wasn't my person I'd be in big trouble. The other day I got to thinking. If I had a problem here who would I call orher than my husband? Answer: there isn't anyone except one person I know i can count on. We only found each other a few months ago. That's one reason I know I'm not in my happy place. I know when I'm in the right place, things kind of just happily happen. Serendipity rings true without my having to go look for it. It's happened too many times to list. I've moved over 43 times last count... but what sticks out are the places I found my tribes. I still keep in touch with many of these precious souls from my past. Sometimes I pickup the phone and call to confirm it really was how I remembered the way things were. Happily this has rung true each time. Many are getting older and dying off. It's easy for me to pack up and move, more difficult to find the right place... and and at this stage of my life mistakes can get costly. It isn't easy to move like it used to be... so moving to a different country brings on a new level of excitement and adventure for me... at this point if I choose the right part of the world to start I can tweak from there. :)
It is def hard to move, and finding the right people is always a challenge. I am lucky I have my sisters and a few really good friends, but they all live in the US.But I have been living alone where no one gets me for a while, I feel more connected here that I did living in the US. I think when you find your place you will know! I am guessing somewhere that it is green all year, and sunny.. that always helps me!